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\/    Electronic Bore Gage  Digital Dial Bore Gage  Dial Bore Gauges |

\/    Dial Test Indicator  Dial Indicators  Electronic Indicators Digital Indicators  Mag Base |

\/    Magnetic Base   Flexible Mag Base  Universal Magnetic Base  Steel & Granite Indicator Stand | \/    Micrometers  Mag Bases | \/      Digital Depth Micrometer  vernier Depth Micrometers  Dial Depth Micrometer | \/    Go No Go Thread Plug Gage   Screw Thread Pitch Gage   Angle - Radius Gage Transfer Punch  Drill Gage  Dead Blow Hammer Quick Quill Stop  Steel Stamp Set | \/    Rout-A-Burr   Deburring Tool Set   Mill Stop Vise Stop  Diamond Needle Files  Scribers Steel Needle Files   | \/    Digital Readouts Quill DRO  Power Feeds  Edge Finders  SPC Interface | \/    Lathe Chucks   Lathe Quick Change Toolpost   Toolholders | \/ Vises  Rotary tables  Sine tables   Indexers  Angle Plates |    Machinist Jokes   CNC Humor   Machinist Humor   CNC Jokes         Commandments For the Machinist     1. Thou shalt not read thy Modern Machine Shop on company time, lest thy employer make it impossible to continue thy car payments.     2. Thou shalt not covet thy shop coworker's Digital Caliper, nor his Electronic Edge Finder, nor his wood Gerstner Toolbox.     3. Thou shalt not store thy machines out-of-doors except for the Enco lathe.     4. Thou shalt not deceive thy wife into thinking that thee is taking her for a Sunday drive when indeed thou art going out to Harbor Freight.     5. Thou shalt not love thy Digital Dial Bore gauge more than thy wife and children.     6. Thou shalt not despise thy neighbor's Logan Lathe, nor his South Bend, nor even his '47 Clausing .     7. Thou shalt not tell thy spouse the entire cost of thy latest Granite Plate, Stand and Height Gauge at least not all at the same time.     8. Thou shalt not promise thy wife a new garage for the house and then use it to store OBI Slant Side Presses.     9. Thou shalt not allow thy sons and daughters to get married during the IMTS show.     10. Thou shalt not buy thy wife a set of 1-2-3 and 2-4-6 blocks for Christmas. (Precision Jewelry)   Does Briggs & Stratton make a crate motor for a Enco benchtop mill/drill??   You paid too much for that CNC when your local HAAS Distributor names the new wing of his shop after you.  The only 2 tools you will ever need are WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it moves and it shouldn't, use the duct tape.     If it doesn't move and it should, use the WD-40.   What's the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers?   Mechanical engineers build weapons.   Civil engineers build targets.   How do I mount my .50-caliber machine gun on top of my CNC     so that my CD player Boomblaster doesn't skip when I shoot?   The less time planning, the more time programming.   Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner   Law of the Workshop: Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings...they did it by killing all those who opposed them.   Law of the Workshop: TEAMWORK... means never having to take all the blame yourself.   Law of the Workshop: INDECISION is the key to FLEXIBILITY. Click this link to next page of jokes